Rough weekend when you have this possible news looming over you. I try to be strong for the kids, but had several days/nights that were rough. It was General Conference weekend and there were some great talks, sometimes I had a hard time concentrating on them. Went to a couple of soccer games on Saturday.

Met with the OB/GYN again today. I had to wait a little while because he was at a delivery in the hospital next door. He had very concerning news to give me and had a hard time getting it out. They found a tumor on my left ovary and it is fairly substantial in size. Based on the ultrasound report it had fluid in it as well as some vascular portions that were concerning. He also said that the blood test had elevated levels that could indicate cancer - but could also be a result of other things. He then encouraged me to get an appointment with a gynecelogical oncologist because studies have shown that if this is cancer, the outcome is much improved if treated by a specialist.

He sent me back out to the receptionist to set up an appointment with a specialist ASAP. He recommended a group that works out of St. Mark's, so once we found that my insurance covers them I set up an appointment for the following Tuesday (the soonest they could get me in).

I was pretty okay emotionally at this point, but once I got back to my car I had a little cry before I headed back home. My husband was already home whe I got there and he jokingly said to me, "So, you've got cancer?". Unfortunately that was not the right thing to say at the time, so I naturally broke out in tears...

Came home from driving someone somewhere and had a message on the answering machine from the OB/GYN. He wants me to come into the office to discuss the results of the ultrasound. At this point I still think it is just routine. I don't feel nervous about having to go back in - just a little annoyed that they won't just give me the results over the phone. I call the office back and make an appointment for the following day.

Ultrasound today. I seriouly felt like calling and canceling the appointment because I have felt fine since I met with the OB/GYN. They had me drink a ton of water before the appointment and I was just about ready to burst before hey finally called me back for the ultrasound. The tech started with the standard ultrasound on my abdomen, then she thankfully let me use the restroom, followed by an internal ultrasound - not comfortable at all. The tech gave me no results or hints about anything that she may or may not have found. She aked me at one point how long I had had the pain and I said off and on for about 1 1/2 months - around the beginning of August. When she was finished, I got dressed and went home.

I met with an OB/GYN today about a pain I have been feeling in my lower left abdomen - and sometimes in my lower back similar to my back labor pains. I think I started feeling it around the beginning of August. The pain has just felt like a cramp like I get when running or over-exerting myself and it comes and goes. My abdomen is also a litle tender if one of the kids steps on me. Nothing constant at all, but I will feel it periodically when I am just sitting not doing anything. I've looked up symptoms on the internet and am not concerned at all about it. Probably just an ovarian cyst which can go away on its own. I finally called to set up an appointment just to have it checked out.

We discussed my family history (which isn't good as far as cancer is concerned). I also know that I have a breast cancer mutation gene called BRCA-1 which puts me at higher risk for Breast Cancer and Ovarian Cancer. The doctor felt around some and could feel something there that he wanted me to have checked out with a pelvic untrasound. The doctor also had some blood drawn for a blood test. He also recommended a mammogram with the history of breast cancer in my family. I asked if that could be done while I am still breastfeeding and he seemed to think that I could (turns out that he was wrong and I was right). Since my husband was leaving town the next day for a business trip to China I decide to wait until he gets back from that to have the ultrasound done.